You said you don’t need it, but you clicked “add to cart,”
Now you’re wrapped in this thing like emotional art.

You got ten at home, still you fell for the scheme,
Soft fabric hit you like a psychological dream.
You tried to resist, but your willpower broke,
Now you struttin’ ‘round cozy like this was a joke.

This ain’t fashion, this is fleece domination,
Comfort so illegal it should need documentation.
You put it on once, now it lives on your back,
Bernie watchin’ from the woods like, “Yeah… just like that.”